BOUNDARY - All The Bible Teaches About

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  1. Brothers and Sisters in Christ
  2. Boundaries
  3. What Does the Bible Say About Personal Boundaries? |
  4. Six Healthy Boundaries for Christians

Matthew - But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. Galatians - Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.

God's boundaries for sex in marriage

Philippians - Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things [are] honest, whatsoever things [are] just, whatsoever things [are] pure, whatsoever things [are] lovely, whatsoever things [are] of good report; if [there be] any virtue, and if [there be] any praise, think on these things.

Psalms - The LORD [is] the portion of mine inheritance and of my cup: thou maintainest my lot. Psalms - He maketh peace [in] thy borders, [and] filleth thee with the finest of the wheat. Mark - For every one shall be salted with fire, and every sacrifice shall be salted with salt. Proverbs - [It is] better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.

As Christians, this is probably the most obvious boundary we expect to see in Scripture. The Bible is more than a list of what to do and not do. Although it is more than a rulebook,it still tells us what to do and not do. In short, the Bible says we should have personal boundaries when it comes to our morality. Sin, in effect, is caused by overstepping a boundary that should have been in place in our lives. There are ethical and moral lines you must not cross. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.

Brothers and Sisters in Christ

In this Bible passage, we can see that our moral boundaries should be governed by love. The Bible talks a lot about boundaries in your relationships. Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, love for the Father is not in them. Additionally, Jesus had clear boundaries within his relationships. He did not entrust himself to unbelievers, though he loved them and came to save them John Amongst his disciples, he seemed to even have sublevels of boundaries, meaning he kept most of the disciples in one relational area, but he allowed Peter, James, and John into a different area of his life.

Jesus even seemed to take it a step further and had boundaries around each individual relationship, for when Peter wanted to know intimate knowledge about John, Jesus reinforced his boundaries and told Peter, in essence, that he was crossing a line he was not to cross:.


You must follow me. Peter was crossing a relational boundary and Jesus helped him return his focus to where it belonged — following Jesus in his own life. Often times we will need to reinforce boundaries for people like Jesus did here to help others respect our lives and relationships. What Jesus did for Peter is what he does for us all.

We can squander our whole lives away by worrying about things out of our control. When confronted with their lack of boundaries, they raise good questions:. Can I set limits and still be a loving person? What are legitimate boundaries? What if someone is upset by my boundaries? How do I answer someone who wants my time, love, energy, or money? Why do I feel guilty or afraid when I consider setting boundaries?

What Does the Bible Say About Personal Boundaries? |

How do boundaries relate to submission? Aren't boundaries selfish? Misinformation about the Bible's answers to these issues has led to much wrong teaching about boundaries. Not only that, but many clinical psychological symptoms, such as depression, anxiety disorders, eating disorders, addictions, impulsive disorders, guilt problems, shame issues, panic disorders, and marital and relational struggles, find their root in conflicts with boundaries.

The Bible study group that had been meeting at the Craigs' house for six months had suddenly become more intimate. Tonight the five couples began to share real struggles in their lives, not just the usual "please pray for Aunt Sarah" requests. Tears were shed, and genuine support, not just well meaning advice was offered. Everyone, except the hostess, Rachel, had taken a turn talking. Rachel had been the driving force behind the formation of the Bible study.

Defining boundaries

Caught up in her leadership role, however, Rachel never opened up about her struggles. She shied away from such opportunities, preferring instead to help draw out others. Tonight the others waited.

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Rachel cleared her throat. Looking around the room, she finally spoke, "After hearing all the other problems in the room, I think the Lord's speaking to me. He seems to be saying that my issues are nothing compared to what you all deal with. It would be selfish to take up time with the little struggles I face. Disappointment was evident on each face.

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Rachel had again avoided an opportunity for others to love her as they'd been loved by her. This boundary problem is called avoidance : saying no to the good. It's the inability to ask for help, to recognize one's own needs, and to let others in. Avoidants withdraw when they are in need; they do not ask for the support of others. At the heart of struggle is a confusion of boundaries as walls.

Six Healthy Boundaries for Christians

Boundaries are supposed to be able to "breathe," to be like fences with a gate that can let the good in and the bad out. Jim had never been able to say no to anyone, especially to his supervisor at work. He'd moved up to the position of operations manager in a large firm.